They Did What?

They made a record of remixes of Gustavo Santaolalla's theme "The Wings" from Brokeback Mountain. Apparently, the gays needed a 10-minute club mix. Actually, they needed five of them. When I heard about the record, I immediately thought it was some SNL joke which got out of hand. But no, here it is:



I can't help but imagine that the same people who have written this in response to the majority of negative reviews on iTunes--"Now you naysayers, PLEASE STAY HOME AND DO NOT GET YOUR CHUBBY BODIES ANYWHERE NEAR A DANCEFLOOR"--are the same people who, when I saw the movie, laughed out loud when the actors got either intimate, or even vaguely naked. When I hear gay men talk about Brokeback, I still wonder if they saw the same movie that I did.

I guess if we want to dance the night away to an anthem of homophobia, lost love and self-hatred--which is what Brokeback Mountain is really about--then here we have several to choose from. I listened to the remixes; they seem to have left out that part where Jack Twist gets beaten to death with a tire iron, and Ennis del Mar gets to live the rest of his life wondering what could have been different.

And as for not getting my chubby body anywhere near a dancefloor, let me only say this: You have nothing to worry about.

BBQ in Crestwood, and other things.

Yesterday several of us took the Metro-North up to Crestwood to have a Memorial Day BBQ at my friend Chris Cerasi's childhood home. Perhaps the highlight of the trip--not including, of course, the grilled meat items and Kip's potato salad--was Chris's mother announcing, after trying to figure out which one of her children had made a desultory comment about something many years ago, "It was probably you, since you're so critical." It was the kind of situation where you learn everything you ever will need to know (or previously considered) about your friend from meeting his parents.

On Friday night we saw X-Men: The Last Stand, along with a theater full of other geeks. (For anyone who's not seen it yet, stay until the very end, until all the credits are over...trust me.) After, we all chose our own mutant powers, mine being the ability to become instantly shower fresh. And, of course, to be able to make others shower fresh, something we've all wished for here in NYC.

Today I'm of to a rehearsal for a parade, which will kick off the River to River Festival. Later in the festival, Ricky Skaggs will be performing, along with film screenings of Barefoot in the Park and Rear Window (among others,) as well as many other arty-farty things to do--all of them for free.

MacBook Secured*

*Thanks, Kathleen!

New New New (and it also comes in black)

My friend Witold (see Yoga: Art + Science) and I went to the new Apple store on Fifth Avenue today, ostensibly to buy me a new laptop, but really just to see what all the fuss is about.

The store is entirely underground, in the plaza in front of the GM building, and you enter it via this I.M. Pei-looking glass cube, on a staircase that descends into MacLand. It's quite lovely. The store is harder to navigate than the SoHo store, despite it seeming smaller. It's hard to differentiate between the Genuis Bar and the checkout, and products are sort of laid out in all areas of the store. MacBooks in two corners, iMacs along the wall...and also over here on the low table with squishy balls for desk chairs. I'm not sure what the big idea is, but okay.

Mostly we played with the Photo Booth software on one of the MacBooks, taking pictures of ourselves and emailing them to our friends. We also scrolled through all the sent mails in the Mail app, looking at other people's pictures. You could even see how this particular laptop had been moved around the store by seeing what part of the architecture was behind the people in the photos.

I also tried to chat with the other people trying out the MacBooks, using the iChatAV program, to no avail. You could sign in as your MacBook, and see the other computers on the network. Some of them were on-line; most were not. But I wrote "Hey" to them, and when that didn't work, I tried "Hello."

No purchase was made today. Come next week, I figure, I'll be sitting here with a MacBook size helping of new technojoy.

Go For It, Teenagers!

A recent study conducted by Janet Rosenbaum of the Harvard School of Public Health and appearing in the American Journal of Public Health resulted in many interesting findings, and naturally, even more interesting implications. The study surrounded "virginity pledges" in general. You know, those things where you vow not to have sexual intercourse until marriage...yeah, those.* Officially, the study described them as "a public or written pledge to remain a virgin until marriage."

The first thing they discovered was that the majority of the teenagers recanted their pledge within the first year. And those who were at one time sexually active and later took the pledge, were more likely to lie about their past sexual histories. And 73% of the ones who did have sex during their virginal tenure later lied about having pledged entirely.

However, the craziest thing Ms. Rosenbaum discovered was that the teenagers who had sex then refused to acknowledge it because of the new pledge actually believed that their new sexual history (read: we're virgins again!) was true...thereby grossly underestimating their risk for STDs. And anyway, all the girls I knew in high school that who were trying to preserve their virginity were still having oral and anal sex. Plenty of it.

Ms. Rosenbaum also wrote: "It's very tempting to craft stories about what may have been going on in these adolescents' minds as they changed their recollections, but [the] survey data doesn't give us enough information to substantiate the stories."

So, it seems that the teenagers who decided that being a good God-fearing Christian wasn't exactly the coolest thing to be were, like, totally kidding about all that lame virgin stuff.

*(I remember when these first came around my high school. I looked at the paper and saw intercourse and marriage and thought "well, none of this applies to me.")

Some Ideas

I’m thinking of something Sharon Olds said in an interview once about how she doesn’t watch TV or read a newspaper. (Or drink coffee or smoke cigarettes.) She wants her writing to be pure, and absolutely accurate. And she noted that perhaps the fact that she doesn’t make herself a very well-informed citizen could mean she doesn’t make a very good artist. She was unsure about the idea. It wasn’t something she recommended. But I hear what she’s saying about accuracy. (And clearly, Sharon Olds is a very good artist.)

I think a lot about what the body has to do with writing. I always complain that I’m jealous of sculptors and glassblowers, welders and such. Because their art has all this weight to it, big machines that move and grind, smells and textures. Protective gear. Writing is just me and my keyboard. And my brain. When I’m exhausted from working, it’s all in my head--I just want to watch some shitty TV--rather than being burned or choking on fumes, or covered in sandstone dust. Which is a strange thing to long for, but there it is.

At the bookstore recently I saw two different books, both remaindered, about spontaneous combustion. The first was by one neurologist and the other was by a team of neurologists. The books studied the phenomenon, and using the vast array of tools available to modern science, the doctors had come up with several different theories on how and why spontaneous combustion occurs. But I kept thinking that the more correct explanation is that: sometimes people just burst into flames.

Am I the Only One Finding This Hysterical?

Octavia

I'm currently reading the newest (and sadly, the final) novel by Octavia E. Butler, called Fledgling. It's about a race of vampires called the Ina, and their young "experiment" Shori, who discovers that thanks to genetic engineering, she is the first black vampire.

When Ms. Butler died in February, KCRW's Bookworm replayed an interview from Fall 2005, just after the publication of the novel. She talked about how writers mine their lives for material, and in that work, you learn who you are. The host, Michael Silverblatt, asked her about the complexity of morality, and I thought about those two things together: becoming more and more yourself as you age, and at the same time accepting more and more moral ambiguity. Or maybe you have the opportunity to discover more empathy. I can't quite figure it out yet. I'm young, and idealistic.

I also encourage folks to listen to the Bookworm show, because I do a killer impression of Michael Silverblatt, and it's so far gone to waste since no one I hang out with can appreciate it. Also enjoyable, is the fact that Ms. Butler sounds exactly like Project Runway's Tim Gunn. Make it work, vampires!

Velveeta, ahoy

Dr. Marcella Meyer, a Kraft Foods shareholder, recently proposed that Kraft withdraw their sponsorshop of the 2006 Gay Games VII, in addition to any other activity which supports the homosexual lifestyle. The proposal was rejected by 99 percent of the company's shareholders, according to AdAge.com

Dr. Marcella's bizarre logic stated that Kraft would be legally liable if the participants and attendees "experiment with homosexual encounters and later develop a series, even fatal, illness." Read: When they come here and give each other AIDS, we want to be as far away as possible.

Marc Firestone, who is the executive VP-corporate counsel and also corporate secretary for Kraft, sent a memo to employees last May underscoring their support of the Gay Games--and subsequently, of gay people, unlike Dr. Marcella. The memo read, "Diversity makes us a stronger company and connects us with the diversity that exists among the consumers who buy our products."

So, two things. First, call Kraft Foods (800-323-0768) and tell them that you support their stand on the Gay Games....haven't they heard enough from the right-wing idiots? And then run out to the store and stock up on Velveeta, which you know you want to do.

Going Green

People who live in New York State can now choose to buy their energy supply from an Energy Service Company (ESCO) rather than from their local utility. This means that you can individually select what kind of energy you use, and make the switch to Green Power.

Green Power is electricity generated from renewable resources such as solar, biomass, wind and hydropower. For just a few cents more per day (about $2.00 per month in my case) you can select to have the energy in your home come from one or more of these sources, which, of course, helps safeguard our environment, as well as making a sizable dent in the happiness of the universe. It also helps to diversify the economy in your local region, creates healthier air, and significantly reduces your service provider's dependence on fossil fuels...which, if you extrapolate, could help us keep our military out of, ahem, unwaranted situations.

So, the utility still controls the delivery of the energy to your home (imagine the wires and the underground pipes) but you can choose the source.

For those of us who live in New York City, you can "Go Green" by visiting Con Ed's website. If you live in another part of New York State, go here, or if you live somewhere else in the U.S., you can go to this handy Green Power Locator, provided by the EPA, here, and see what options are available in your area.