Also, the role of me in the movie of my life will be played by a mostly-naked Daniel Radcliffe, who will perfect my East Tennessee accent, as well as gain and lose the same 15 pounds over and over, thus winning him an Oscar. In his acceptance speech, he will shout my name over the play-off music and everyone will say "Too Little, Too Late" in the papers the next morning.
Title suggestions, anyone?
Opening Credits -- Liar, by the Cranberries, live in 1994
This is from an unknown bootleg I have of theirs from back in the day. The intro is killer, perfect mid-90s pop, and at this point during the exercise I feel as if my computer knows how to excite an audience.
First Day of School -- Anticipate, by Ani Difranco from 2002, 11/04 Paradise, CA
"for every hand extended / another lies in wait / keep your eye on that one / anticipate." I cannot say enough about what Ms. Difranco has brough to my life. This blog post is the best I can do. This song isn't nearly one of my favorites, but I'll take it.
Coming Out -- Here I Am by Emmylou Harris
Perfection, I say! This further illustrates the symbiosis I have with my laptop. Something amazing is happening to Emmylou's voice as she gets older. It's becoming fainter, it cracks easily. It's so beautiful--nobody's recording like that anymore. In this scene, I go from place to place, coming out, and it has the look and feel of Julia Roberts in Erin Brockovich when she was going around town to tell everybody how much money they won from the lawsuit.
First Love -- A Lack of Color, by Death Cab for Cutie
"If you feel discouraged / that there's a lack of color here / please don't worry lover / it's really bursting at the seams / absorbing everything / the spectrum's a to z." Here I am again, overly concerned about the way some emotion is perceived, and thus I have to process.
First Song -- Dawn, by Cinematic Orchestra
I'm not sure what sort of song this would make for your first. There is no beat, and no words, only a wonderous drone for about four minutes. Maybe this first song leads to a sex scene, which later leads to the....
Breakup -- Time Will Do the Talking by Patty Griffin
"I change the lock on the door / I learn how to take a little more / I can outrun all of the devils here / But never the doubt." All hail the church of Patty Griffin. It's an instant-conversion policy, I believe.
Prom -- Danger, by Erykah Badu
For some reason, at my prom I decide to go rob a bank or maybe shoot some people. "Thinkin bout lives that you've taken / All the love you've forsaken / Niggas gon' get they fuckin head blown."
Driving -- Alone But Not Lonely, by Mary Chapin Carpenter
Then I'm driving a long stretch of dark road, while on the lam. But I'm okay. I got my Mary C.C. to guide me: "There are moments in time that are meant to be held / Like fragile, breakable things / There are others that pass us, you can't even tell / Such is their grace and their speed."
Flashback -- Since You Been Hard to Find, Kelly Clarkson vs. American Analog Set
This a great mash-up by somebody. I "archived" it from the WWW.
Waking Up -- Spring Haze, by Tori Amos, 2005 Manchester UK
"i found out where my edge is / and it bleeds into where you resist / and my only way out / is to go so far in" Tori's music is like an IV line directly into her consciousness. Hook me up, and I'm following her, wherever she wants to go. Fun places, dark places. I trust her completely.
Leaving Home -- Star Guitar, by Chemical Brothers
Have you seen the video Michel Gondry did for this song? The versions of it on YouTube are all badly converted, so you miss a lot of the greatness. So check one of them out here, but then imagine me on that train.
New Love -- Black Heart Today, by Amy Ray, bootlegged from 2005 4/19, NYC
I'm not sure what these lyrics are supposed to mean in this scene. "Take this meanness out of me / Take this meanness out of me / Take this meanness out of me."
Wedding -- Both Hands (dance mix), by Ani Difranco.
Now my iTunes is laughing at me.
Birth Scene -- Irresistible Bitch, by Prince
It's still laughing. Only this time, The Gods are laughing, too.
Final Battle -- Here Comes the Flood -- Peter Gabriel
"When the flood calls / You have no home, you have no walls / Dont be afraid to cry at what you see." This scene will be played mostly in silence, except for Peter's voice. At the end of it, everyone would be breathless and regretfull.
Death Scene -- Another Part of Me, by Michael Jackson
This is the version from Captain EO, the 3D movie that was at Disneyland for years and years. I was (read: am) so jealous of Anjelica Huston as the Supreme Leader.
Funeral Song -- Any Way You Want It, by Journey.
Okay, this is getting ridiculous.
Final Credits -- Lay Down, by Floetry
Somebody's getting busy right after my funeral? I'm hoping it's a throng of sobbing queens, who have an orgy on the steps of the Capital Building, one final act of civil (and totally hot) disobedience.
Let's just spend a little time,
Do a little more
Share what's in our hearts
Give each other all
Nothing more to do,
Lying right here with you
Let's just lay down
Hey Mario, Amanda and Michael, you're tagged. And you too, Rob, because Ted already tagged you and I can't wait to see what fabulousness your iTunes churns out.